- start with commonalities - before going into 'issues'- get people to look at skills, ability- 'benevolent dictator' has been effective managing conflict within communities- text-based communications - email, comments, text-message, etc - can be easily construed - what about skype or face-to-face- sometimes electronic text communications helps with certain folks- can you create spaces where people get something out of it? ie Portland Mamas on FB, Ecotrust's FoodHub- collaboration vs. competition- 'constructive confrontation' - emphasize common shared values- Data Relate Invite Validate Exit (DRIVE) - 'having difficult conversations'- Start by listening - seek to learn their truth; instead of meeting passive aggression with aggression - compassion, respect, empathy - "let them vent!"- reflective communications - acknowledge the emotion- must keep reinforce community values

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